Premier Announces JUNO 2010 Legacy Project: JUNO Fever Forever!

The Honourable Danny Williams, Premier of Newfoundland and Labrador, and the Honourable Terry French, Minister of Tourism, Culture and Recreation, today announced a permanent legacy project to mark the 2010 JUNO awards being held this weekend in St. John's.

"I am a wild party," said Premier Williams, who is nominated in the Songwriter category for his hit single Yes We Have!. "We are pulling out all the stops to make this the wildest JUNO awards ever. We have the screechiest Screech, the druggiest dealers, the bustiest hookers. Guy hookers too, if that's your thing."

"However, given the amount of alcohol and other intoxicants to be consumed this weekend, we anticipate that some people will have trouble remembering that the JUNO awards were ever here, or that I was ever at them" said Premier Williams. "That is why my government is pleased to announce today that we are committing $1.3 million towards retrofitting Kimberly Row in downtown St. John's to look exactly like it does in the JUNO logo. We anticipate that by the time we announce this project another eight times, and are finished dragging our feet on actually doing the work, the final cost will be closer to $2.9 million, thereby stimulating the economy on a go-forward basis."

"Can I get a word in edgewise?" asked the Honourable Terry French, Minister of Tourism, Culture and Recreation. "For chrissake, I'm the Honourable Terry French, Minister of Tourism, Culture and Recreation!"

"Pfffffttt! You gotta be kidding me! No, you cannot," said the Honourable Danny Williams, Premier of Newfoundland and Labrador, "Besides which, you wouldn't fit edgewise into a hangar for the goddamn Hindenburg."

"OK, sir, sorry, sir" added the Honourable Terry French, Minister of Tourism, Culture and Recreation.

The Government of Newfoundland and Labrador has invested $1.025 million in the 2010 JUNO Awards, including $750,000 to host, $200,000 to establish and support the JUNO Host Committee, and $75,000 to assist with JUNOs on George, an unprecedented street party that will be featured during the Sunday, April 18, television broadcast of the 2010 JUNO Awards.　In exchange, the Government of Newfoundland and Labrador has received a 4.9% equity stake in future JUNO awards and a seat at the Big Boys table.

For more information about Premier Danny Williams, visit: http://www.gov.nl.ca/premier

Conceptual drawing of JUNO 2010 Legacy Project: JUNO Fever Forever!

Bad medicine

Williams government hires new pollster

Talks break off

So anyway the big news today is that talks between the Government and the doctors have broken down. Danny says that the doctors are asking for too much money, and so he is sticking to his tough bargianing position.

Good thing, we say!

Let the goddamn doctors stay in the ground until Danny gets a fair deal.

Let the goddamn doctors stay in the ground. They aren't going any where!!!

Diamond or Square?

Mount Pearl is the latest thing in Newfoundland Labrador to get the "branding" treatment, and IP Freely couldn't be happier for Pearlites! The Mount Pearl Curl is finally banished as your official national symbol!

But we are very disappointed in Mayor Randy Simms that the public was not given a full opportunity to take part in the "branding" process. Though we are sworn to secrecy about how we got our hands this graphic, here are the two final candidates for the brand new brand... the one that was selected, and the one that didn't quite make the final cut.


So what do you think? Are you a "Diamond Mount Pearl" fan? Or do you prefer the traditional Mount Pearl Square? Pearlites only, please!!!

IP Freely endorsement

The 2011 election isn't until 2011, but that doesn't stop us from getting out in front of such an important matter as this one.

We have been looking for a candidate who embodies the three of the things we love the most. Cats. Weed. And Old St. John's. And so that is why IP Freely officially endorses Sketchy Jerome for Premier.

Just a heartbeat away

"Premier Kathy Dunderdale"?

The Warm and Fuzzy Summit

Won't someone think of Tommy!

Danny Williams comments on the importance of public health care...

Don't forget your health card!!!