Danny Williams and his Chamber of Secrets

Danny Claus, why?
Why are you keeping things secret from us?
Why?

Danny BINGO

Today we start a new series - Danny BINGO.

Just download the card (a new one to come each week) and keep it by the radio and/or where you watch TV or read the paper. Then just carry on with your normal life.

Every time you hear or read the words of our Glorious Leader Danny Williams, Praise be His Name and Hallowed are is Words, mark the Danny-word square.

When you fill them all in, call out "Danny-BINGO!!" and turn it into your local MHA for your prize. We can assure you that it will be the finest prize their constituency allowance can afford!

So listen to talk radio, watch the news on TV and read your papers. Mark your spots and you may be a winner!

(card #1)

On the campaign trail

Tourism, Culture and Recreation
August 13, 2007

Media Advisory: Minister to Take a Dump

The Honourable Tom Hedderson, Minister of Tourism, Culture and Recreation, will take a dump this afternoon, Monday, August 13, in Clarenville.

The dump will be taken, sanitary conditions permitting, in the mens’ washroom of the Irving station on the Trans-Canada Highway, at approximately 3:00 p.m.

"Clarenville is an important community on the East Coast of our Province," Minister Hedderson said. "I am honoured and pleased to be able to take a crap in this historic and scenic town, and encourage all Newfoundlanders and Labradorians to shit at home this year."

The Minister will be available for a photo opportunity immediately before voiding his bowels. He will also be available for comment immediately afterwards, most likely by calling Bill Rowe, who will ask uncomfortable questions about the texture, colour, odor, and buoyancy of Minister Hedderson's turds.

Media representatives are asked to confirm their attendance by calling or emailing Ken Cleary, Communications, Department of Tourism, Culture and Recreation.

-30-

2007 08 14 10:22 a.m.

Steve Kent - Man of many colours!

Get ready to see this on on a TV near you.

License plate roundup

It looks like the government will be offering us a wide variety of license plates to choose from.

Courtesy Bond Papers:

Courtesy Table Mountains:


This one was last seen rolling onto the Port au Basques ferry. It seems he was an engineer from St. John's who couldn't find a job. He was pretty joyful in laying down his professional career in the service of his Premier and his province, though.

New license plate

Government was good enough to update our automotive license plates featuring bold, clear and strong blue lettering. It turns out that those red letters were blurry, hard to read and kind of shifty in strong light.

Here's a sample (to be issued to the Premier personally) contributed by our friendly source at Motor Vehicles.

Labrador

Premier Williams' Constitutional reforms

The Confederation Building is pretty leaky these days.

The most recent news from the government of Our Glorious Leader is a constitutional initiative centered around deletions to the Canadian constitution. This initiative will be unveiled very soon in another massive publicity campaign reminiscent of the provincial branding campaign.

The centerpiece will be this video.

Blogger Defence Fund

As a result of the actions and threats of government of legal action against bloggers over the last week, IP Freely is initiating a Blogger Defense Fund (BDF).

The BDF is a cooperative which will pay for the legal defense of paid-up blogger members. Any blogger in the province or writing on provincial issues is free to join the cooperative.

The law firm which has agreed to represent the BDF is the Toronto firm of Phukem, Skrewim and Bloughmie.

Willamina Noenotting, lead counsel, has assured the BDF that she and her colleagues Elizabeth Bloughprem and Anthony Psuckdyk will be offering a vigorous and zealous defense of the security, integrity or freedom or speech of the bloggers of Newfoundland and Labrador.

In the meantime, as a way of showing support for the Blogger Defence Fund (BDF) we are providing the opportunity for free speech loving bloggers everywhere to share their feelings with the government.

If you are interested in participating, simply:

• Print out the button design below
• Glue it to any old campaign button you might have lying around
• Wear it with pride!

Thank you for your support!

Hang it near your phone

A friendly reminder from your government.